Goodbye, Twenties

These are the twilight hours of my twenties. They are slip sliding away quietly in the night, never to return. I'm feeling my age. My stomach hurts, I have cramps, a headache, and a strange sniffle that is just enough to be annoying. I'm a little short on direction in my life, which makes me sad. But it makes my parents sadder.

Oddly enough, this is usually the section where I lament how terrible my life is, but I'm just not feeling it at the moment. I guess I'm mostly ok with things right now. I'm enjoying my classes, my job doesn't suck completely (yet), and I do stuff that I like and that I want to do. I've got good friends that talk to me and listen to me and want me to be happy and call me up when they need a laugh. I'm not in any trouble: financial, physical, social, or emotional. (that I know of) So I guess I'm pretty comfortable. Which is more than I can say for some of my other years (age 25 comes to mind).

I live in a beautiful part of the country; everyone back home gets jealous whenever I mention the beach. I can't afford real estate here, but that's ok, because I can't afford it anywhere. I'm not married and I don't have a boyfriend, and that makes me a little sad because my little clock is ticking and starting to be more vocal about the fact that I'm not getting any younger and no one will want me when I'm older, fatter, and saggier, and ending up a spinster is my single greatest fear in life. But again, at this very moment, I'm not feeling the pain of being unwanted or uninteresting or unattractive, and I don't know how to explain why. I guess I don't really know why. Maybe because a big fat zero will be added to my stats tomorrow, leaving room for other stuff. Because when there's nothing, you can only add to it. Nothing else can be taken away. Wednesday, the middle of the week towards the end of the year, everything winds up again and starts a new decade for me to fill with stuff that will eventually be known as "my thirties". Goodbye, twenties.