Firsts

I'm working on a repertoire of infused vodkas, and I'm trying the fourth flavor: peach, raspberry, ginger. It's pretty good. Fruity, and a little spicy. But still very very potent. I'm feeling it.

So as you may know, I went swimming with sharks the other day. Totally safe; they were leopard sharks that feed on really small animals. I looked them up, and the article said there is one incident of a leopard shark 'harassing' a diver in the 1950's because he had a nosebleed, but he didn't sustain any injuries. Still, there is a knee-jerk reaction to seeing a 4-5 foot shark below you, sometimes almost close enough to touch.

The whole experience was a collection of firsts. The first time I've ever swum with sharks, of course. Also, the first time I've ever gone snorkeling. It's definitely a weird thing to breathe through your mouth. I also have a tendency to panic when I can't breathe normally, so when water gets in the tube, I choked a little bit. Still, I think once all things are considered, I did pretty well. I'm glad I'm a good swimmer. Thanks, Mom, for paying for the swimming lessons all those years.

Last first. The boy is the one who took me out for my first time. I don't remember the last time we actually *did* something. In public. With each other. We often see each other in public and are friendly, but this, according to one of my colleagues, was a date. He even said he got off work an hour early so he would have time to go snorkeling with me before visiting his mom in the hospital. Should I be impressed? Flattered? Suspicious? I chose B. Especially since I had (kind of) done the same.

So it was great on all three counts. And I felt good because I had finally done something I had always wanted to do. I'm not quite ready for serious scuba lessons, and I might not go snorkeling again anytime soon (the water gets cold fast), but I actually did it. And it was with the boy.

And then. We're walking to our respective cars, and he says, "Uh, I should have told you this sooner, and I'm sorry, but *insert name here* (i.e. the girl) is coming to town this weekend." My response: Okay.

What else is there to say? What am I going to do? Nothing, that's what.

And then. "If you're not busy, I'd like it if you came to my birthday party. It's on a Friday." pause. "If you're not busy."

And then. "Let me know when you need help moving. I'll try to make sure I can help you."

And then. "I'm going to see my mom (in the hospital). She's glad when you visit."

So that was the tally for the day. 3 for, 1 agin. (yes, the South is still with me).

I went to the hospital today to visit mom. She seems to be doing well. A little better each time I see her. He was there (with the girl) and hugged me as soon as I came in. I don't think he's ever touched me so much in front of her before. Then they left. They came back later, and while he was sitting next to her, I caught him looking at me on several occasions. I think his mom might have even caught a look between us, because she gave me a look when I looked at her that said "I know you've got the hots for my son, and I know what's up between you." She's a smart woman. I'm sure he and I aren't fooling anyone. Except the girl, who is so socially awkward (yes, I witnessed it) and out of place that she can't see what anyone else is doing except for her. Yes, I'm putting my own opinion on her, but still, I like to think I have a certain clarity of thought that helps me see things from time to time.

I actually shook her hand today, which I don't think I've ever done. I'd like to think I've made some progress in the jealousy department, but when it boils down to it, I know that she doesn't belong and I do. Whether or not the boy can see that, I don't know. I think he can, but he's afraid to give up the convenience of having a 'sometimes' girlfriend who is only in town 20% of the time. Any more than that and he has to care.

Anyway, that's the way things are at the moment. Up in the air (as always), but looking (somewhat) hopeful.