Insomnia

I can't sleep. I've been awake for the past two hours. I know this is going to suck later. So I put on some Miles Davis, hoping it might mellow me out enough to make me sleepy. I'm not betting on it. But you never know. I made a list of things I have to do, and it ended up being longer than I thought it would be. And I need to add a couple more things to it. I also got my work schedule yesterday, and this week is going to be brutal. Four shifts that start before sunrise. And we all know what a morning person I am not, despite these odd mornings when I turn into an insomniac. I think they are trying to kill me. They got me all rested up (i.e. out of shape) and then come up with a week of torturous shifts. And the drama never stops. So I am always preoccupied with something I wish I could forget (see previous post).

I'm going to see the pro at the club this afternoon. Still looking for the answers. Among other things.

I found out yesterday that a dude at work really likes me but will never ask me out, or is going to take forever to work up the courage. I have mixed feelings about it. Because we all know the rule about dating people you work with, and I'm not sure I'm in the mood to start seeing someone new when I can't even get the old ones out of my system. I can only do one thing at a time. Still, I'm not ruling anything out. I'm just not going to try to rush into anything with a person who relies on humor and ribbing to get my attention. Plus I'm crazy, and it's only a matter of time before he figures it out like everybody else does.

Anyway, I feel kind of sick to my stomach, or hungry. I can't tell which.