During the Holidays
Of course, there is always a James Bond marathon to watch over the holidays. And if there was a movie title that could embody my life, Dr. No is it. I have a PhD in no. At least getting them. What a pro. Too bad there's not a job for that. So now I'm killing time after planting a plant until I have to go to work and be depressed and stuff my face with as many sweets as I can fit in my mouth.
Tomorrow I have lots to keep me busy, but I'm sure it will all go undone so that I can mope and feel sorry for myself in true holiday fashion. What fun.
Today he was saying how the ex's always change into people he doesn't recognize. He said he doesn't see me as that kind of person. I tried to think of a change I've made for someone else, but realized that a few weeks isn't enough time for anyone to change me. They just dump me instead, seeing that I'm not worth the trouble. He also said that he takes it personally that they would rather be with someone else than with him and I can't help but want to smack him. It does suck when ex's move on without you, but I feel that it's worse when they would rather be alone than be with you. He would rather have no one than me. How do you think that makes me feel? So I must say that it makes me feel a bit patronized when he tells me how great I am. Yeah, great, but not great enough. Thanks a bunch. He'd rather spend a night with his couch than with me. It's like I'm some sort of vampire; he's afraid to see me at night. So it's lunch, or breakfast, with a two hour time cap so he can get on with his life and I can't make too big a dent in it before I go. So the friends he really likes get to come over, take him out, have drinks, all sorts of things and I get scrambled eggs. Don't get me wrong, I like scrambled eggs. I also like champagne and dinner salads and talking until the wee hours without a scheduled end time that makes me feel like an intruder. But whatever, when one has so few friends like myself, it's not really for me to be able to choose my time. I have to take whatever I can get. Even during the holidays. Especially then.
Tomorrow I have lots to keep me busy, but I'm sure it will all go undone so that I can mope and feel sorry for myself in true holiday fashion. What fun.
Today he was saying how the ex's always change into people he doesn't recognize. He said he doesn't see me as that kind of person. I tried to think of a change I've made for someone else, but realized that a few weeks isn't enough time for anyone to change me. They just dump me instead, seeing that I'm not worth the trouble. He also said that he takes it personally that they would rather be with someone else than with him and I can't help but want to smack him. It does suck when ex's move on without you, but I feel that it's worse when they would rather be alone than be with you. He would rather have no one than me. How do you think that makes me feel? So I must say that it makes me feel a bit patronized when he tells me how great I am. Yeah, great, but not great enough. Thanks a bunch. He'd rather spend a night with his couch than with me. It's like I'm some sort of vampire; he's afraid to see me at night. So it's lunch, or breakfast, with a two hour time cap so he can get on with his life and I can't make too big a dent in it before I go. So the friends he really likes get to come over, take him out, have drinks, all sorts of things and I get scrambled eggs. Don't get me wrong, I like scrambled eggs. I also like champagne and dinner salads and talking until the wee hours without a scheduled end time that makes me feel like an intruder. But whatever, when one has so few friends like myself, it's not really for me to be able to choose my time. I have to take whatever I can get. Even during the holidays. Especially then.
posted by Ocean | 3:31 PM
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