Sorry

I have to make this quick. Damn this sucks that I'm not getting enough "me" time to do the things I like to do. Stupid work. Stupid school. Stupid everything. The diet is going ok. I don't know if I've lost any weight yet, but I feel better since I've taken control of what I eat. I weigh myself once a week. Four days to go. I can't stand it when my pants are tight in the waist.

I feel like a freak. I hate the things that happen to me in the natural course of life. One day I forget my chapstick, and the next two weeks I'm walking around with a split lip that is not only painful, but a serious eyesore. I probably look diseased. And I can't stop messing with it because it is so uncomfortable. I hate that.

I have recently been struck by the feeling that it is futile to try to look good. I will always look ridiculous. Always look a little "off". There is no escaping it. And there's nothing I can do about it. It seems like yesterday I had ideas and today they're gone completely. What's happening to me? Am I turning simple?

This is a stupid post. I'm sorry you read it. I'll do better next time.