Murphy

So I guess the Eagle has landed. Or something like that. I'm in a real fix; one that I have never been in before. Who knew this was possible? I guess I know all the things that need to be done and steps that need to be taken, but it's still scary. I feel like a total moron. I can hear the questions from pretty much everybody in the process, which will all boil down to "what the fuck were you thinking?!" And I will have to concede that yes, I am an idiot, and I didn't do what I should have done. And that's how I got here. And I am scared about being alone in this.

I hate bad timing. Which is really the story of my life. This is no exception. I canoot think of a worse time for this to happen, except for the saving grace that after tomorrow I won't have to work for an entire week. So I've got some time to myself to think about what I have done and what I will do. God I feel stupid. And irresponsible. It's one of those things that you think is never going to happen to you because you are too smart or too educated or too responsible or too careful or too paranoid for anything to go wrong. But Murphy didn't get a law for nothing.