I Want.

I want. I want. I want. I want. I want. I want. I want. I want. I want. I want. I want. I want. I want. I want. I want. I want.I want.I want. I want.Iwant.IwantIwantIwantIwant.

I want someone to love me. I'm tired of feeling so unloved and unwanted. I clearly want to be with someone that I love. And I do love someone. And I want him to love me. But he doesn't. And I don't know why. I only know he doesn't. And that I want. I obviously don't know what to do about it. And I obviously don't understand why I'm so unlovable. It makes no sense.

I'm a good person. Maybe I'm not perfect. But I want someone to tell me I am. Because they love me. I don't want to be unlovable. But I can't figure out what makes me this way. I don't know if it's my glasses, or my wine fixation, or my weird eating habits, strange fashion sense, or goofy sense of humor. Or maybe my odd listening skills. And talking skills. Or maybe a combination of everything. Or something I haven't thought of yet.

But I do know I'm tired of aching for someone (in particular) to touch me tenderly and look at me in that way that I like. That way that makes me melt. The way I ache for him; that's how I wish he would ache for me. And it hurts to know he doesn't. And to know he probably never did. But that doesn't mean I still can't want it.