Public Stuff

This insomnia crap is really starting to suck. I keep thinking it will take care of itself and I'll crawl into bed at night and fall asleep because I'm tired. But I guess that's how insomnia is. This weather isn't helping much either. So if you want a current tally of my life, here it is: I am broke. I have no desire to stay in school, California, or anywhere else. My friends are mean to me. It's cloudy. I can't sleep. I dread my job.

Life is so over my head, I don't know how I got this far. I was able to count my friends on one hand before, now it doesn't even take that much. Every time I think I'm going somewhere, I'm further behind than I thought. Oh yeah, and don't forget that construction on my house isn't over yet, and loud noises are continuing to wake me up. I have always thought that there was something on life for me, something to offer, something I could hold on to. Now I'm beginning to wonder what that is, or if there even is anything. My parents' basement is starting to look like the only place that will be suitable for me. This public stuff is just beating me up every time I open the door, my mouth, or my heart.