Changes and Possibilities

I slept in today. Really. Almost till noon. Even for me, that's a lot. But I was up late last night, plus I was tired from the days exertions. Yes, school is definitely an exertion. But lately I've found myself getting along more easily with more people, and that makes me happy. I don't know exactly why, but there are more people that I don't feel threatened by, more people that I'm willing to talk to, fewer people I'm avoiding. And as always, I am able to see the idiocy of my own actions. I am more willing to let things other people do slide. I take apologies. Gladly. I strike up conversations.

I can't say I've ever been shy. Quite the opposite, actually. But I can say that I often feel uncomfortable around people I don't know very well, which makes me seem like a total bitch when I look around like a convict and constantly shift my feet and bury my hands in my pockets. I'm a strange bird, no question about it. But at least I'm not as strange as I've known myself to be in the past.

I don't know where the change has come from. Possibly the excitement of new things around me. Possibly the loyal friendship of a woman that makes me feel like I'm part of something, and much younger than I am. Possibly the acceptance of someone I've always cared about that makes me feel like I have nothing to fear, nothing to defend. Or it may just be me growing older and (gasp) more mature. But I doubt it.