Losing It

I've been doing sit-ups like an OCD gymrat since I got back. Trying to get the Riviera body *after* I went to the Riviera. I don't belong here. I might as well look like I don't belong as much as possible. I think it's helping, but I'm not sure. I need some before and after pictures. Too late. Not that anyone cares except for me. But I guess it's kind of like the underwear thing; at least I'll have a little secret under my clothes.

I sound like a psycho. That's ok. People treat me like I'm a psycho anyway. Like I might snap at any moment. I guess maybe I could. I just don't know what I would do. I'm crazy.

But at least I'll have a flat stomach and sexy panties on when I lose it.