Spoiled Brat

It's really dark in my house because of the lack of sun. It's pretty dreary. I kind of want to just go back to bed, but of course I have to do some of the work I've been neglecting to expertly. It's getting to be crunch time.

So I'm sitting in this house all by myself, and all I can hear is the tapping of my fingers against the keys and the rain outside. It almost sounds nice except for the voice in the back of my head that keeps telling me what a loser I am. My phone is not ringing; the tv offers no comfort. I dreamt something strange but can't quite remember it. Loneliness has sunk into the couch next to me and I know it's only there because I let it be. I don't have to feel this way. But, I'm acting true to spoiled brat decorum, and if I can't have exactly what I want, I'm going to pout about it instead of getting something else that's probably just as good. At least there is no one around me that I can make miserable (because I'm really good at that).

Ick. What a dumbass I am. No wonder no one wants to be around me. And that voice is driving me nuts. It's almost like having my mother in my head 24-7. Always saying I told you so. I can't help it. I suck. And what's more, I am always going to feel this way. All because I'm a spoiled brat to begin with, and whining comes second nature to me. Is it possible to want to know about someone without wanting to talk to them? I guess so. Talking to people involves a lot of other crap that doesn't include knowing. Argh. Now I don't even make any sense. I apologize to both people reading this.