Good, Bad, Ugly
Still nothing. No one is reading. No one is calling. My phone has not rung in over 48 hours. Not once. Not even a wrong number. And my pathetic ass is still checking it to make sure it's on. I feel like I have the plague. Even if someone did make contact, would I even have anything to say? Well...
I broke a wine glass today. With my bare hands. I was washing it and it just broke. Amazing I didn't slice my hand open.
I got a surprise paycheck from when I used to be a librarian. That was in May. Definitely takes a bit of the crunch off.
I got a grad fellowship, which entitles me to some money. Not a lot, but I'm not complaining. If I got 19 more, I could go to school and not have to work. Cool, eh?
I finished my first project in Sound. I'm satisfied with it.
I got to see my name in the credits of a couple films that aren't mine. One was a 'special thanks' that I didn't know I would see. That was nice.
My big bro might come to visit in December and see a football game with me. I've never been to an NFL game in person before.
I finished my first short screenplay last night. It might suck, but at least it's finished.
So that's the new news. Not that anyone cares. Now the old news..
My mother and my sister aren't speaking. My swing state relatives are voting for a monkey for president, if they're voting at all. I feel really untalented and stupid every day at school. Not to mention incompetent. I haven't seen the ocean in almost 2 weeks. I haven't walked on the beach for over 2 months. I am forced to work more than I would like for less money than I need. I have not spoken more than 2 sentences to my best friend since Monday because he is too busy for me. I don't even think he notices things like that. It makes me feel like a sideshow. He doesn't even know what I'm talking about half the time. Which only magnifies the distance that is increasing between us, much as I try to keep it together. He doesn't laugh like he used to, and he doesn't call me 'just because' anymore. It makes me sad. And I'm sick. He doesn't know. My family doesn't know. The only people that know are the people at work. Because that's where I caught it. It's enough to make someone feel like a real winner, isn't it?
I broke a wine glass today. With my bare hands. I was washing it and it just broke. Amazing I didn't slice my hand open.
I got a surprise paycheck from when I used to be a librarian. That was in May. Definitely takes a bit of the crunch off.
I got a grad fellowship, which entitles me to some money. Not a lot, but I'm not complaining. If I got 19 more, I could go to school and not have to work. Cool, eh?
I finished my first project in Sound. I'm satisfied with it.
I got to see my name in the credits of a couple films that aren't mine. One was a 'special thanks' that I didn't know I would see. That was nice.
My big bro might come to visit in December and see a football game with me. I've never been to an NFL game in person before.
I finished my first short screenplay last night. It might suck, but at least it's finished.
So that's the new news. Not that anyone cares. Now the old news..
My mother and my sister aren't speaking. My swing state relatives are voting for a monkey for president, if they're voting at all. I feel really untalented and stupid every day at school. Not to mention incompetent. I haven't seen the ocean in almost 2 weeks. I haven't walked on the beach for over 2 months. I am forced to work more than I would like for less money than I need. I have not spoken more than 2 sentences to my best friend since Monday because he is too busy for me. I don't even think he notices things like that. It makes me feel like a sideshow. He doesn't even know what I'm talking about half the time. Which only magnifies the distance that is increasing between us, much as I try to keep it together. He doesn't laugh like he used to, and he doesn't call me 'just because' anymore. It makes me sad. And I'm sick. He doesn't know. My family doesn't know. The only people that know are the people at work. Because that's where I caught it. It's enough to make someone feel like a real winner, isn't it?
posted by Ocean | 10:28 PM
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