You Meltdown and I Freeze

I saw him at his usual place. It used to be our usual place. He was stressed out. He had too many things to do, he said. He couldn't keep up. His family was asking things of him he didn't want to do. Work was overwhelming him. He didn't have time to get things done. Silly, extra things that are a pain in the ass. He had found himself looking forward to his favorite things ending so he would have more time. He didn't like it. I understand. He looked and sounded like he was about to have a meltdown. And I failed. I didn't know what to do. I wanted to fix everything for him, but I didn't know how. I felt like I should leave him alone so he would have some time to himself, but I didn't know if that would actually help. I felt like I was burdening him with my presence, with phone calls and outings and whatever else. It is a terrible feeling to see him trapped, this man that I care about more than anything, and not be able to do anything. Or even have words of encouragment for him. I really just want to call his family and say "Leave him alone, he can't handle your melodrama" and call his boss and say "Leave him alone, he's the best you've got". And I want to take care of all the little stuff he has to sweat like going to the post office and the video store and checking out stuff online. But there is a weird piece of him that likes doing that stuff. So he won't let me do it. So I'm stuck with just feeling bad for him. Hoping he figures out a way to get everything back under control. Wishing I had something helpful to say or do. So I just sit there and shut up. Not exactly what one would hope for in a time of personal crisis. The worst part is that when I'm in trouble, he always knows exactly what to say or do to make everything ok. And I couldn't return the favor. I feel like a loser. I want to help. I want to be leaned on. I want to provide the shoulder that he seems to need. I froze. I suck.