Epiphany

After lecturing/yelling at me one week ago today, then giving me four consecutive days of silence, he calls. And not only that, but he calls in a chipper mood with 'what's up with you, stranger?'. I can't help but be a bit mystified, and a bit irritated. There was a bunch of drama last week, and maybe more that he doesn't know about because he hasn't bothered to ask me what I'm thinking. He obviously doesn't know anything about my mental state, or he would either not call at all, or call and be concerned. But he's bouncing along as if nothing happened, and everything is hunky dory. Call me crazy, but if I had a friend that I talked to every day, then didn't hear anything from for 4 days, I'd be a bit concerned.

But maybe I'm completely delusional. Maybe I'm not really as close to his life as I thought. Maybe I'm really just a sideshow that bugs him from time to time. Maybe he really doesn't give a fuck about me, which would definitely explain the 4 day silence, as well as the completely disrespectful "I'm going to talk to you like you are 4 years old" lecture. That would explain the random name-calling and threats that sound like "I'll just take my toys and go home if you aren't going to play my way".

This could be an epiphany.

Maybe he really doesn't give a fuck about me.

It all starts to make sense when I look at it that way.